Did you know?... The names of the two stone lions in front of the New York Public Library are Patience and Fortitude. They were named by then-mayor Fiorello LaGuardia.

Giant Hail

Hurricane John hail.

Jack Sparrow Tattoo

Regrettable tattoo number 4981.

Lifetime Achievement Award

College. I miss it. My liver doesn&#039;t, but I sure do.

Liquid Chicken

It&#039;s nothing to worry about, it&#039;s just the state between solid chicken and chicken gas. Chicken gas really stinks, by the way.

Snakes On A Plane Sign

I predict a cult classic.

Baby Smoke

Anybody interested to see what I looked like as a child?

Hollar Back Hoe

Aint no holler backhoe?

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Microsoft has started making text books?

Heroin

Now here&#039;s something you don&#039;t see every day.

Jessica Simpson Lost Her Voice

...and part of her nose too.

College. I miss it. My liver doesn't, but I sure do.

It's nothing to worry about, it's just the state between solid chicken and chicken gas. Chicken gas really stinks, by the way.

Now here's something you don't see every day.